Hello, Anxiety: I'm Moving To New York Tomorrow
Updated: Aug 7, 2018
Well here I go… I guess that’s it… goodbye LA… *Deep breath. Deep breath. You’re okay. You’ll be fine.
Yeah… I’m kind of a stress case, but I’m trying to be less of one. I mean, I am REALLY trying. I thought I had made quite a bit of progress, between hours and money spent on therapy, my frequent meditations, plenty of deep breathing, and practicing living in the moment… BUT HOLY SHIT. I woke up this morning and I guess all of that hard work went right down the drain because here I am a TOTAL. ANXIOUS. DISASTER. What was I thinking? Living in the moment? Not planning anything? I am leaving for New York tomorrow and I have yet to pack a single thing. I haven’t even done my laundry. I am supposed to be moved out of my apartment by TONIGHT. And to top it all off, I have 38 unread text messages that are going to make my head explode (if you are reading this and I haven’t responded to you, I swear I will get back to you in the next 48 hours).
But what can I do to cure this anxiety I am feeling right now? The old me would stare at a wall for 40 mins while anxiously playing with my hair, letting my thoughts run wild until I start to cry, then call one of my best friends who is probably getting a little bored of hearing about my emotional meltdowns (love you guys), let them comfort me, fall asleep from the emotional rollercoaster I just put myself through, then realize I still haven’t packed, so I repeat the panic attack all over again. WONDERFUL… JUST WONDERFUL.
That’s the old me. Letting my anxiety take over. To those of you who also experience anxiety, it’s no joke and I’m not trying to make it one. Anxiety is freaking HARD to get over. The truth is that no matter how hard you work to eliminate anxiety, it will still come up every once in a while because that’s just part of the human experience. Don’t beat yourself up about it because then you will likely have even MORE anxiety about HAVING anxiety. Accept the way you are feeling. Practice your deep breathing, meditate, and be present. This might not be a cure-all to every anxiety attack you have and sometimes you will just have to ride the wave, but every wave you take will make you a better swimmer (look at me with all my cute little metaphors).
Today, I am managing my anxiety by reminding myself that it stems from my excitement for my big move to New York (it’s true, anxiety and excitement are very closely related emotions)! I am also doing some good old fashion reflecting by writing this article (which surprisingly, is making me feel a lot better already.) Finally, I am taking deep breaths (and a lot of them), while I put one foot in front of the other. I got this! Totally ready to dive into the deep end that is NEW YORK CITY ( I really need to stop with all these aquatic metaphors… apologies)!